bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
