You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize