Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
We named our party play list daddy issues
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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