Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
