I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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