I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
