Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
he was CRYING into my vagina
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
