i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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