Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Randomize