he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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