I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize