Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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