Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
