is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize