hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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