so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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