I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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