worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
