can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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