great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize