I can't watch pbs sober anymore
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
