We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
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He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
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I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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