the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize