i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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