My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
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Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
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Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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