my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
The air taste purple.
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