problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
