Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
