Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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