It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
