bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize