After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
