Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
