We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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