So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
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