do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
