remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
