i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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