dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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