She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
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