nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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