It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
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I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
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I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Couch. On fire.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
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