I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
