when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
