Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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