i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
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