okay pat passed out under dana's car
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
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