Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize