once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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