:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
