How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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