I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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