i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
